We had an unexpected crisis last week. Elijah found Bob, the hamster, dead in his cage and was very upset. I know it’s just a hamster, but he is a little boy who is just starting to mature and understand the realities of life. He knows death, he remembers losing his grandpa and so he comprehends on maybe more of an adult level than he should that this is not a life altering loss. Yet, he was attached to this little creature that we spoke to and interacted with daily. He is already hurting badly and missing Anthony an incredible amount right now. He did not need another emotional blow, especially not 2 days before Christmas. So, I suggested that this might be an opportunity to rescue another little critter from the pet store and give it a good home and he grabbed on fiercely. I am torn that I may be sending him the wrong message that pets are easily replaced or that he should get over it by getting another, but I just feel in my heart that he needs this little companion. He needs to fill the hole of sadness that he is carrying around and if this will do it, then I will make it happen if it’s within my power.

"Hammy" the Hamster

So, priorities shifted, schedules were changed and off to the pet store we went on Christmas Eve day. He was excited and a bit nervous, and I was harried and exhausted. We chose our furry friend and while I just want to get him home and get back to last minute wrapping and baking, Elijah was lost in the moment and crazy over his little fuzzy treasure.  My son says the darnedest thing sometimes. He looked at me with shining eyes and said, “I know I’m being mushy and maybe I shouldn’t be, it’s kind of embarrassing, but isn’t he just the cutest, sweetest little thing curled into a fluffy little ball in his carrier.” I think for a moment, gather my best mother wisdom. I somehow sense that this is one of those pivotal moments in my boy’s life that shapes the man he will become and that this more than just a simple question. As a parent I am never quite sure what the right thing to say is, but I reply from my heart, “There is nothing wrong with being mushy when you care about someone or something and it’s perfectly fine to feel affection and happiness towards this little guy. Feeling is the most important thing in life and you should never be embarrassed about it.” I hope that’s the answer he needed and that someday my boy will make someone a loving, caring husband and father. For now, he will be a devoted hamster owner with huge heart and that is enough for any mother to ask for.