This morning I am greeted by both the destructiveness and incredible beauty of nature. It reminds my of life; the tumultuous roller coaster ride – twists and turns, some steep, some minor – all interesting if you stop to watch and wonder.
Our resident chipmunk has been digging in my plant again!
Mr. rose bush greets me in full bloom!
I finally finished the last load of laundry at 10:30 last night and crawled into bed sore and completely wiped out. Way too tired for my wine, but I managed a celebratory piece of pie. I was so proud of all that I accomplished, but found myself in tears because Anthony wasn’t here to share it with me. It is so very lonely going to bed without Anthony to hold me each night. I miss talking, sharing and touching.
Today is another day and I will take it one day at a time. I did manage to complete my list of weekend chores yesterday and I promised Elijah that we would take the remainder of the weekend off. No chores, nothing that even remotely resembles work.
Today is all about playing and enjoying our last bit of summer. It’s filled with Wii, my deplorable performance at Rock band, getting in shape for recess (Yes, my 11 year old told me that,) making cookies and a sunset picnic at the art sculpture park.
Unfortunately the day is marred by the disappointment of not being able to Skype Anthony as planned. It is supposed to be my Skype date night with Anthony. Unfortunately, the wireless connection is down at the base once again and he is unable to get through. This happens so often, in fact two or three times just this week. It is so frustrating. There is nothing we can do about it. It is not a high priority to the military. They don’t seem to understand that what keeps us sane and whole is looking forward to these connections with our loved ones. It is heartbreaking for us and horrible for moral on the base. I just wish they would get a clue sometimes.
It has been a quiet week so far, unsettlingly quiet. Elijah is away and that takes the noise and chaos level down about 20 decibels. Even Alexandra noticed and commented to me on how silent the house is with him playing, building contraptions, randomly singing and carousing with his friends. I sure do miss that little boy! He texts me updates from Long Island; we’re at splish splash, having a cookout, at the barber with grandpa. It’s like my own personal Twitter commentary and it is endearing and quite hilarious if you think about it. Yes, I really do miss that boy.
I am sleeping a bit better, inching up to about six hours a night and still reaching toward that elusive eight. I took sort of a leisurely morning today, sleeping in until 7 or so. I really didn’t have to start work until about 9AM or so (I usually start around 7, but that is my choice.) I decided that I would take advantage of my flexible schedule and the summer weather, by drinking my coffee outside and reading my book at the start of my day instead of at the very end when I am nodding off between pages. The sun was just up, the neighborhood quiet, my roses blooming and life is good. It was a deliciously rare treat and it felt excitedly similar to playing hooky from school, which of course I never did so I am actually guessing how that would feel.
If I could start every day like that, life would be just magnificent….but reality intrudes and that just isn’t possible on a daily basis, so I will soak up and marvel and this wonderful gift of a quiet and relaxed morning surrounded by my favorite things. Work was…well, work. I had a quick, but still comforting chat with Anthony late morning and then the periodic hair appointment, followed by more work, then an average evening at home with Alexandra. I finished the day where I started it, in my chair, on the porch, with my book, surrounded by my flowers and the sun slipping away over the horizon.
My evening continued after sundown with prep work for tomorrow, email and blog updates, but really none of that is significant. Today was one of the good days and that is all that matters for now…
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