It’s that time of year again. Twice a year, early spring and late fall, I gently trim…OK, ruthlessly hack…my bushes back to allow for new growth. And every time my husband shakes his head, utters something like, “Oh No,” and asks the same question. Every time. “Are you sure that’s not going to kill them?”

And I give him the same answer. Every time. “No, it won’t kill them. Cutting them back keeps them from being overgrown, removes the dead wood from the inside of the bush and allows for better new growth.” We have been having this conversation twice a year for the last 15 years or so.

I’m the gardener. He’s not. I do the landscaping. He mows the lawn. To be fair, in the world of grass growing, if you cut the grass too short it can die. That’s his world. But plants, bushes, flowers, are different. If you don’t cut them back, snip dead blooms, remove extra shoots and cull the older stems, they will turn ugly, overgrown, unruly and often eventually rot away.

In short, you can kill your garden with kindness. I understand the need for tough love gardening and I apply it liberally.

I know that my landscaping will look sparse and open in March, but by April, the buds will start growing and filling in. By May, the garden will be bursting with new growth and lovely blooms.

I am willing to live with what the outside world would consider ugliness, for season long beauty. But to my nature loving eye, this too is beautiful. Nature is comprised of cycles, as is life; birth, growth, pruning, setbacks, nurturing, getting stronger and growing in beauty each year.

My garden is a metaphor for life. Perhaps, that’s why I love it so much. I identify with it on so many levels. We are just the same. We grow, we prune our lives, we have ugly periods, and yet, we emerge stronger and more beautiful than ever before.

What a lovely thing!